Sober May

I just read the last post and realized that only three people probably know what the hell I was writing about. The rest of you possibly thought I literally got drunk. My apologies. Sometimes I write these things so fast that I don't stop to consider that, well, you guys don't know what I'm talking about.

So let's see how I can word this - I've been listening to a lot of Adele, and I know how she feels. I also threw in a bit of Pink, Alicia Keys, a whole lot of Country, and, of course, Bonnie Raitt's "I Can't Make You Love Me" which I consider one of the saddest songs ever written.


Got it? If not, then look it up or ask your neighbor.


So with my drunken/foolish/stupid days behind me. I awake to nice little hangover in the beginning of May. As we all know, this hurts. Literally and figuratively. It hurts a lot (Yes, even for cold-hearted Scorpios). All you really want to do is throw up, take an aspirin, and get into bed. Then repeat. You're mood shifts from tired to grumpy to sad (could not have borrowed the Adele CD from Sarai any sooner).
My mom was talking to me about something today and she said, "It was a couple of weeks ago. When you were sick." Yes, yes I was.

"Next to being married, a girl likes to be crossed a little in love now and then. It is something to think of, and it gives her a sort of distinction among her companions." - Mr. Bennett in Pride and Prejudice.

**I would like to interrupt this blog to report that I just spilled a bunch of water over my table and it almost reached my brand-new laptop. Luckily it did not reach my new toy but that's because it was soaked up by the very important paperwork I had on the table. I want May to be over now!**


BUT... hangovers don't last forever.


**Let me interject once more to say that the last statement should also be applied to the current Hangover movie franchise. Really you guys? It's the same script except they've changed the location from Vegas to Thailand. I realize this has worked for the Fast & Furious franchise but I do think we're all burning an awful lot of good brain cells here. I'm just saying.**


As I pointed out in the last post, May is a stand-alone month this year. The decisions made this month have led me down a different path than if I had stayed in my drunken state. (I really hope you Psychology majors are having fun with my metaphor. Comments and analysis are encouraged). I could've kept drinking but that would've only postponed this blog and probably sunk me deeper into the hole I went into.
Obviously it took me a minute to crawl back up and I still have the sense that I'm off-balance (i.e. I can't listen to Lady Antebellum's "Need You Now"). It might take another month or so to fully cleanse the system and that requires some focus. So for the month of June we (by 'we' I mean "Miss I-Kick-Ass-and-I'm-Going-to-Take-the-World-by-the-Balls" me and "Miss I-Want-Normal-and-Simple" me) are going to:
a) work out and focus on our health. Well, we do share one body;
b) be positive. Which could be fun given the difference in what both 'me's think is considered positive; and
c) regroup. Because, apparently, I've been ignoring a goal that--drunk or sober, one personality or two-- I should've never taken my eyes off of.

So stay tuned for... June Bloom (?) June-Never-Saw-This-Coming (?)Okay, I got a whole month to think about the title. But no worries my faithful readers, you do not have to wait a whole month for the next blog because there was a road trip this past week :-) Stay tuned for the details of our bank heist, hiding in canyons and fighting off deadly snakes, and meeting sexy-yet-dangerous men.

Disclaimer - Some of the details of the next blog may have been created by the author's imagination. By 'some' we mean 'all'.